Are You Sabotaging Your Success?
For many, when success is at their doorstep, this grand moment is one that brings on a wicked case of stage fright. In this moment, they become frozen in the moment of their glory and fear taking the leap to the next level that will allow them to break through to the other side of the barrier where the land of milk and honey lies and all their hard work will finally have its due. At this critical juncture, they become suspicious or believe when the pieces are falling into place; the sinking feeling befalls them that any moment the bottom will fall out…BOOM.. they will lose it all. Even worst, some believe they do not deserve success, it’s meant for others, not them. What triggers some to sabotage their success?
Below, I’ve outlined a few key points that may be the clues to solving this mystery and how to stop preventing ourselves from taking the leap to the next level.
1. Attitude. How you given your attitude a review lately? A bad attitude is one of the most common things that can sabotage your success. A negative attitude cannot see opportunities when they show themselves. A bad ‘tude spends too much time focusing on negative rather than positives that appear right in front of us. We attract what we feel, think and believe. Develop a positive attitude and you will get more positive.
2. Fear of Failure. I recently wrote a guest post for Jane Purdue’s blog on subject Failure is Event, Not a Person. We all fail. This isn’t a newsflash. What is news worthy is how we respond to failure, our character is found in the way we react to failure. How we bounce back and use the failure as a lesson. Many of us are so afraid of failure that we avoid it like the plague and as such we never begin that company, project or idea. We let it hold us back from our purpose. The fastest way to sabotage our success, never even start a project so you cannot finish – or fail. Remember, failure is just event, it doesn’t define you, it’s not a person, it happens. You take the lesson and move forward.
3. Advice. You want to take advice, but you need the right advice. Seek out counsel from others who have had similar experiences that you are having, not someone who hasn’t taken your road. Opinions are like…everyone has one. You need someone who can give you sound advice. Really, at the end of the day, the only way you are going to get the answers you seek is by doing it, not listening to others.
4. Thinking Small. Small thinking limits your dream and success, this is a very common way we sabotage ourselves. We tend to believe that we cannot dream big or have a great idea that is beyond our scope of imagination. We keep ourselves in our comfort zone…that will keep us there if do not allow ourselves to believe there is more to our ideas. Think big, and you will achieve it.
5. Make A Plan, Work The Plan. I am forever grateful to the man with the plan who gave me this line and the genius to know this nugget has been the foundation of my life. One sure fire way to sabotage your success…not having a plan. You have to have a roadmap. No direction, you have no place to go.
6. Have Faith. You have to have believe in yourself. Your friends, family will come and go in their belief in you – yes, they will. But you, you must never waiver in your belief in yourself, your faith in your purpose. Everyone has a talent, no one is talentless. If you ever lose faith in yourself, you have sabotaged success at its root. Find your gift, believe in it and never let go.
7. Fearless. Be a risk taker. Now, I’m not advocating this is where you decide to take up skydiving, but rather, calculated risks. Use your judgment. Sometimes you will need to weigh the options, and go for it. You cannot hold yourself back with “ifs, whats, buts” now you have to start making boundaries, decisions and put your butt on the line. Once you lose that safety net…you might surprise yourself.
8. Why do it today when tomorrow works too… Procrastination. The fastest way to sabotage yourself put it off until tomorrow…or next week…or never. If you want success, you have to make it happen – no one is going to do it for you. It’s up to you. You cannot look for a team to do it or wait for another person. It’s you. Make a habit to get it done.
9. My Way Or The Highway. One way to take yourself out of the game of success is to believe your way is the only way. We must be open to different ways of seeing solutions and problem solving. Most people are chock full of beliefs that control the things that they do, habits that control the way they think. Our misconceptions can cause us to make poor decisions and choices that sabotage us. We must logically look at our choices and base our actions with a mindset that takes into account feedback we receive and innovative choices from a place of not being set in our ways.
10. No Time To Think, Just Do It. This relates back to having a plan. You need to spend a little time thinking about what you are doing. You may be passionate about your idea, your goal. But you need think through the process, be mindful of your steps. Weigh the thoughts out and without interruption as much as possible. Meditation is a great way to clear your mind and deeply consider your thoughts. The time you spend is an invest in yourself and it pays off. You will have plenty of time to implement your ideas and plans once you think it through.
This is only a beginning to the conversation. I invite you to join the #bealeader community this Thursday, August 30th 7pmET/4pmPT as I facilitate the conversation as we discuss ways that we can stop sabotaging our success. Follow the hashtag #bealeader on Twitter.