What I Learned This Week…
Every Friday I ask my son to write five things he has learned as we wrap up our lessons. I conduct virtual school with my son at home. At the end of the week, I like for him to give me feedback on what he feels were the most important take aways he took from our week together. It’s very enlightening to see what he has retained from the work we do together and for him, it’s a great reference to look back and feel a sense of accomplishment of all that he has learned to date.
So this week, I decided, I would write five lessons I learned and see what I could take away from my own week.
1. Boundaries matter.
Creating boundaries are not meant to be cruel to anyone. It’s not to be cruel, personal boundaries are the limits we set in both personal and professional relationships protect ourselves and others to keep us from over promising and under delivering. Our boundaries come from having a good sense of our own self-worth. They make it possible for us to separate our thoughts and feelings from those of others and take responsibility for what we think, feel and do. Boundaries allow us to relish our own uniqueness. Boundaries are flexible. They allow us to get close to others when it is appropriate and to maintain our distance when we might be harmed by getting too close. When the boundaries are in place, and used for good, boundaries protect us from abuse and pave the way to achieving true intimacy and successful outcomes in business.
2. Never count the amount of friends you have, count the friends you have when it matters most.
I prefer not to count friends. I’m not in the habit of collecting friends for the sake of numbers. Social media tends to make this a competition at times, while others seem to have a difference of opinion in how they use platforms to connect with individuals. How many followers do you have on Twitter? How many folks have “liked” your page? etc.. If you are only “friending” others on Facebook because you feel that’s a good business model…maybe you could define what is a friend for me. I define a friend as one who has that’s not just on my virtual radar as a metrics or simply to pitch a product. My personal facebook profile is for friends and family…in fact, , I’ve known every person on that page on average 10 years and we know each in real life…it’s not just virtual. There are maybe three people who have let into my page because we have connected another level that I felt they were at the friend level that we could connect on that page. I do not use Facebook profile as place to pitch my friends, rather, we discuss what’s happening in our lives and it’s a place to connect through the miles that separate us when time and space doesn’t allow us to see each other in real life as we would normally do.
When you open up yourself to others, be sure you to know who you are letting into your world. Remember, you have the right to say no. And more item, if one is “blowing smoke”, and you feel that that something is just off about the attention you are receiving, trust your gut. Our intuition is the best defense we have to protect ourselves from those who may try a little too hard to be a friend. Do your due diligence, vet it out and if it doesn’t feel right to you, walk away.
3. Be prepared for stones to be thrown when you stand up for your principles.
Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets that were before you (Matthew 5:12) this week I stood up for my faith. Apparently, when others feel their own principles do not align with yours, be prepared to be have to stand your ground. Not everyone is going to agree with you. If you feel strongly about your values, do not back down. It’s not to be rigid; rather you should never feel that you must weaken what you believe in your heart to pacifier another. They have their right to their own belief and you have your right to yours. In the end, judgment comes from one who has a higher pay grade than us.
4. It’s gratitude that sees you through the darkest of hours.
When it seems that the world is in total chaos and nothing is going your way…be grateful. When it appears that you are at the end of your own rope, be grateful. There are so many things out of our own control, yet, we can be grateful for all things big and small that we do have in our small part of the world. Find solace in what you do have and focus on what matters most.
5. You never know who is listening to your message.
With the power of social media platforms, you never know when the right word will touch someone. Our words in short bites or long form like this blog has significance with others. We should mean what we say and say what we mean. There is power in language and be sure you are communicating what you want to say and in a way that makes it very clear to be understood.